Hardwick is amazing. He is down to earth and cool and funny and has well coiffed hair. It's cool there. We sort of hang out and joke around and do makeup and then go on and try and get some laughs. It definitely does not feel like you are on tv. Which I like.
Oh yeah. The thing is, you’re so scared, but every day you’re just dreaming of doing Conan or doing a special on Comedy Central, so when it comes, it’s terrifying but great. You know, as a guy you’re scared to have sex but you want it so bad, you do it. Also, as a comic, you realize how hard getting on TV is, that you’re not going to pass it up out of fear. When you’re at Conan behind the curtain waiting to go out, and they pull it open and say ‘you ready?’ you see the lights, the crowd—it’s crazy.
I am ridiculously lucky to be included in Breaking Bad, a truly amazing show. I'm just glad I'm not fucking it up for everyone. When people think my presence actually helps the show, well, that's just "honey on a walnut" to me...is that the phrase?...no, wait, now I got it, that's just "an altoid on a pretzel" to me. It's a good thing.
Oh. Well I thought a Minute with Stan Hooper was the best thing I ever did outside of stand up comedy. But Fox didn't stay with the show. It was a show that was intended to turn very dark, like at the end of the first season, it was set up like a homespun show, and then at the end of the first season my wife was going to be slaughtered by the town barber that we'd come to love as a kind of a funny old fella. Anyways, turned out he was a psychosexual sadist. but they never let us get to the end. So you never got to see my plan.
And I'm not saying anything against psychosexual sadists. I just think oftentimes you know, they'll slaughter innocents and I'm no fan of that.
In the beginning, you think, I can’t wait to get on television. I’m going to straighten it out. Then people will be saying, “God bless you, Dave Letterman, we have been waiting for somebody to take care of television.” That’s how you feel. And now, I don’t feel that way.
I've never messed with a talk show host. I'm just trying to make my segment as spontaneous and interesting as I saw talk show guests be when I was a boy.
The first time I did it when I was 20 was sweet because I got to leave college and miss a week of school. And I met a lot of comedians of whom I was a huge fan because I was competing against them. Which is ridiculous because I had been doing it for less than a year and a half. But i had fun and became good friends with a lot of comedians I still know today like Tig and Doug Benson and Brendan Walsh.
Who was it that said: If nominated, I will not run, if Elected, I will not serve? Whoever it was, they were an idiot. If nominated, I will run, and if elected, I will serve.
But as we know, television is not a democracy but an oligarchy. They don't hire a lot of guys who run around saying oligarchy. Many times a boss will call me and say "I'll have to let you go" and I'll say "Why" and they'll say "Well you sell more than everybody else at the plant, but you've been saying Oligarchy in the break room too much at lunch. In fact the suggestion box is filled with pieces of paper that complain about that." And I'll say "well sir, Oligarchy, holy fuck" and then I know it's time to pack up my duf...
I said fuck on Saturday Night Live and I thought I'd be fired for it. I wasn't really embarrassed about it but I'm surprised I didn't say it a million times since it's live TV.
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Related posts tagged 'Working with other comedians'
Pendleton is exactly the way you would hope him to be if you're a fan of his work. Imagine being some kind of potion vendor in a fantasy world and one day a famous powerful wizard sends you a message that says "I enjoy your potions!" Then imagine that wizard invites you into his tower of sorcery and for a couple of years you get to help him and his sorcerer friends cast powerful spells that you sort of imagined were possible but had never witnessed yourself. Add two of the cutest pug-dogs on earth to the creatures living in the tower and That's what it's like working with Pendleton Ward.
Being on Curb was the most fun I've ever had other than watching my twin boys clown around for me. It was like comedy fantasy camp. Larry David is another mega-hero for me. I auditioned and got cast as Yari, the vaguely foreign softball coach/mechanic. But I didn't know until I showed up for the shoot that they wanted me to do a speech to the team. So I asked Larry Charles, the director, if it's okay to curse. And he gave me the answer I wanted to hear. So I had about ten minutes to write a couple of things down that made me laugh. Then we shot it and Larry didn't know what was coming. I've heard he's an easy laugher but still, seeing him crack up felt like alley-ooping to Michael Jordan. I'...
I started doing comedy in 2002 and I had a VHS tape of one of my first few sets. I took it to my RA, Open Mike Eagle. He watched it and said you sound like this dude, he played some Hedberg for me. I thought it was amazing.
Mitch played Zanies in Chicago in 2005. I was brand new and I went up to his green room and asked for a spot. (This was really obnoxious but I was hungry and ambitious.) The next night he let and 3-4 other Chicago comedians that he never met perform on a sold out show of his fans. That's unheard of. Comedians just don't do that type of shit. I won't do that shit now. I can be in the greatest mood ever and I won't let a stranger on my show. It went well and he let me open...
I loved them. So much. I love Eric Andre. He is a lunatic too. One of the few legit ones. I missed his birthday and it is a major regret this year. He's a ton of fun. I called him before the show and said "I'm gonna do something really fucking crazy on the show. I'm not going to tell you what it is but I wanted to give you the heads up." He said "Okay cool, I'll go nuts too." I loved it. A lot. So I always welcome him in any situation to do whatever the fuck he wants. I've riffed against crazier things than he could ever bring to the table.
It was very fun. Amy is a joy to watch work. I learned a lot from seeing her on set. She is involved with every part of the shoot and she is extremely upbeat and charismatic at 5'oclock in the morning even if she didn't want to be because she knew it was important for everyone involved in the shoot.
One time Bob despised a sketch of mine so much at a readthru, he told me what was wrong with it for a full ten minutes before concluding, "So I guess I'm saying I hate this sketch and it's trying to kill me," as he dropped it on the ground.
That was on Louie ck's first short film called "Caesar's Salad" I played the part of "crazy pumpkin head" where I charged a group of people with a knife. Nick was one of them. We used a real knife and I dropped it on nick's foot in the scene. Went through his shoe and everything. He had to go the hospital. But he did get a bit out of it.
Lots of fun working with Louis, man. Louis' a little nutty, so you never know what he's going to come up with. The fact he came up with POOTIE TANG alone... but he's a great director and a great writer.
TJ Miller